Weary weekend…
Sunday, April 30th, 2006Today just feels so weird. I know that I have not been sleeping properly for the past two days. But I guess I was trying to make the best of it. It is so hard to be depressed and have fun at the same time I guess.
On Friday night, I had a meeting with Cape Poetics team for the Man Without Shadows play. I will be stage managing for them. It was good to see old faces again. The face that I was very happy to see was Sharmila. I miss her so much since Another Wrestling. I have not seen most of them since I did lighting for Death of A Warrior. As for Kenneth, the last time I saw him was at his wedding. To work with them again will be so fun. Plus I will have an apprentice or two. Plus, it was so weird to hear Pengiran call me ‘TEACHER!!’ It is 4 years since I last taught. It is so strange that my student will be working together with me now.
After which, the RC crew and I went clubbing for the last time as a production team. It was not as fun as the first time but it still was fun. Bumped into Lee Yin, Hoay Hoay and Alvin. Separately though. There were a few funny moments. Prisca got chatted up by an African American. He had the nerve to hint that he wanted her to visit his room. Well, if only he knew that wherever one of us go, the rest of us will follow. After club experience, we went over to my place for a sleepover because most of us did not really want the party to end. That was so fun. Don’t know when I will ever get another chance to do that again.
On Saturday night, we were all sitting on the beach at Batu Ferringhi. It was the very same beach where part of Jungle Spirit was filmed. It is usually quiet there but that night, there was a big group having a barbecue party. All of us were out of it. We just did not seem like our crazy RC selves. Only God knows why everyone was so jiwang yesterday night. I guess sitting on the beach actually does provoke a lot of thoughts. I can’t speak for everyone but at the beach, I had thousands of thoughts spamming my brains. I am confused, depressed, angry and very tired of the whole deal of life. Everyday I am bombarded by this question, “What will you do after this?� and this answer when I say I do not know. “Don’t worry everything will be alright.� As though I do not have any other worries. I have 2 papers coming up still. For the first time in my life, I am not going to get an A for English. Sigh!!
To make matters worse, I saw the idiot that actually tried to two-time his girlfriend with me. I was so angry that I actually had tears. I know that it is so stupid to get my emotions all tied up because of him. Somehow, I hate loose ends because I never had an explanation on why would he want to do such a thing. Then again, it is best to let sleeping dogs lie.
Thank goodness that Astra, Prisca and Chris stayed with me until around 5 a.m. We watched Nanny Mcphee on the DVD player. Interesting movie but I am always reminded of Mary Poppins. The cool part of the movie was that Emma Thompson not only played the lead but wrote the screenplay as well. Yay!!!
This afternoon, Sam and Mich dropped by before they left for KL. I am not sure when I will see Sam again. But since the costumes are with me and my books are with her, I will be seeing her still. It is a wonder how time flies. It was just like yesterday that I met Sam in USM. I knew that back then, she did not really like me. Then Sam and I did not really find our juniors very friendly until we started working with them. I guess I should know by now that I should not judge a person just by appearance.
Well, today I did the unthinkable. I washed the family cars. Well the exteriors at least. But washing cars is not my fave jobs. I just did it because I was bored or perhaps very depressed. I am going to miss these crazy times with the RC monkeys. Will this be the end? It does not help with Chris keep saying, “You all are no longer going to be here.� That statement seems as though we are returning to our makers rather than us graduating. Then again, I am not sure if I will be graduating at all.
Speaking of Chris, I just read his latest entry. Talk about Jiwang…man….
I guess matters of the heart are very delicate indeed. We always hurt the person that loves us the most, with or without realizing it. Yes, we play games just because it amuses us. Then we assume the other party will understand. But do we actually know what is the boiling point of a person? There is only so much insults, jokes and teasing a person can take. For me, it would be about my weight. Jeez, I know I am fat but having it shoved down my throat every single day really does take the cake. Yes, yes the ultimate solution will be losing the weight. That will be a different entry.
Now I am feeling very weary. But I need to fetch my mum and bro from the bus station later. Will try to wake up early tomorrow to study.



