The life and mind of Adeline Ong

The air smells different here. Or it could just be me. It feels really good to be back here after so long. As I look out the balcony, I see headlights speeding to and fro. It is late now. I hope they rush home safely. In the far distance, I see neon lights slowly dying as shops call it a night.

The familiar surrounding of my bedroom brings back faint memories of my past. Almost a year now; I can’t believe how fast time just passes me by. The slow humming of the air conditioner, gives me the sense of calmness that I need; reassuring me that I am home. A mental note to myself, “I sure need to clean this place,� as my eyes wander to boxes that were never open since we moved in. I wonder what hidden treasures lay inside them.

I drove my trusty silver car out earlier. It has been too long. As I climbed into the driver’s seat and caressed the steering wheel with my hands, it felt like a reunion of old friends. I missed this car. It has been my companion for many years. Memories sweet and bitter intertwined, still lingered in the air. Shadows of lovers passed; the late night rendezvous; sneaking kisses amongst warm cuddles. Tears of anguish still stains the seats, the dashboard still bears the bruises of wild pounding fists. All this wrapped within a metal box with wheels.

My eyes grow weary now. The soft bed, swimming in the scent of lavender, beckons. I bid all of you a good night. May your slumber be filled with wonderful jewels of memories to keep. As for me, my stay here is temporary; I knowingly, savor every moment of it, while it lasts.

ACTS Malaysia held a fundraising dinner a few Saturdays ago to collect funds for their activities.

I was there to show support to my colleague.

Nicholas Chin took the excellent photographs you see below.

Thank you Nick!!!

Me? A gym bunny?

No way!!!!

Never in a million will I think that I wills sign up for a gym. You can ask anyone who knows me. I have given people countless excuses to get out of signing up for a gym. My friend, Greg has been trying to convince me to try out a gym since we met at a seminar back in April.

Finally 3 weeks ago, I did. My reason (or excuse) will be that it is because the gym was giving a family package. Seems like a good deal at that time. Though a couple of my colleagues are screaming bloody murder because they fear I might have been cheated. I do not blame them because after all, a major yoga chain just went bust and many customers were left in a limbo. Plus hundreds of thousand ringgit in prepaid services were now non-existent.

Before this particular gym share the same fate, may it be now or the future. I am trying my best to make sure I get my money’s worth. Well, I have attended the gym since last week. I took the dance class and capoeira classes which I am loving. I am not sure if I am losing any weight but I did notice that I am no longer hunching.

Then again, it has only been 2 weeks. Let’s see what happens.

I still have not gotten my own camera. I know, I know. That should not be an excuse anymore but it is true. So once again, my postings are delayed. Here are shots from Short+Sweet which happened in mid August.

Mamaking after the matinee show.

Back from the mamak… Ready for the last show

Intermission card game

Cikgu Qahar’s warm up activities

Half of the week2 Cast

Full cast before the final show.

Cast party. God knows why all of us look like we were about to break into song.

Just a little crazy note for people who get confused on Emo and Goths alike.

I am a Goth. Despite some people believing otherwise due to the fact that I can be extremely hyper one moment and then completely emo the next. Well, it could be that I am bi-polar. Just kidding. (But then again…)

I am categorized as a Perky Goth; Goths who are not always in black and are well, as the name says PERKY to a fault at times. But I like to see myself as a cross between a Romantic Goth and a Perky Goth.

Goths are not Emos.

Emos Hate themselves. Goths hate Everyone! (You all know I do.)

Emos Want to Kill themselves. Goths Want to kill Everyone! (You know I am capable of doing that.)

WHAT IS GOTH? (Quotes from various sources)

“Goth is not a religion or a cult but a lifestyle based on an appreciation for the darker side of life and art.” – Lesley Pratt Bannatyne

“Goth is a state of mind. Romance is at the heart of what it means to be goth. Most goths are goth because of a refined sensitivity to life… goths try to live with dignity; they aim to respect one another. The Victorian goth is a genteel character, mourning that environment which nurtured sensitivity and venerated consideration… goth is a realm devoted to the deepest yearnings of the collective unconscious. It respects what has been traditionally called feminine values in both men and women, beauty, love, refinement, creativity… survive with style and grace.â€? – Nancy Kilpatrick, The Goth Bible

“Goths serve a shamanistic role in society to protest, to mourn, to amplify and relay mourning and anger for the collective mind.” – John Shirley as quoted by Gavin Baddeley

“A Goth is a fan of gothic music. They wear black and act melancholy. Themes that appeal to Goths tend to pertain to the dark aspects of human existence—such as death, romance, and feelings of loneliness or isolation. Many Goths are drawn to the scene due to experiences of abuse, discrimination or ridicule at the hands of “normal� people. To the outside, Goths are weird; black clad freaks who are obsessed with death. Take a closer look, however, and you will find a rich tapestry of ideas and practices and a menagerie of colorful characters. There are many kinds of Goths including but not limited to Romantic Goths, Death Rockers, Cyber Goths, Rivet-Heads, Ethereal Goths, Punks, Perky Goths, and Goth-a-Billys. Each has a distinctive style.� – Voltaire ‘What is Goth’

“Goth in its simplest form is a subculture, a group of people who feel comfortable within each other’s company. There is no specific thing that defines what you need to do or be to fit into the goth scene (except of course the implied black clothing). People in the goth scene all have different musical tastes, follow different religions, have different occupations, hobbies, and fashion sense.â€? – Goth.net

“Many people lead unhappy, unachieved lives. And that’s sad. Goth makes depression and angst a lifestyle choice, and that’s art.â€? – a goth primer

“Goth refers to the modern underground scene. But Goth is more than just a subculture, a gloomy aesthetic or literary genre. It is a philosophical perspective. In Goth, the strange and eerie are commonplace, while the everyday is somehow uncanny. Camp is an important concept to anyone who wishes to understand the gothic aesthetic. The essence of Camp is its love of the unnatural, of the exaggerated and the off.� – Gavin Baddeley, Goth Chic

“Goth culture is a movement embracing the romanticism of darkness and the outcast persona… it is a statement against what is seen as the oppressive, materialistic, and superficial values of mainstream society… Goths are usually gentle people with artistic and literary tastes. Sometimes their deliberate off-putting look is a test to see who will accept them for what they really are. They are sensitive to artificial and superficial social behaviors.â€? – Marcia Montenegro

“Most people pass through the valley of the shadow of death, you people build condos there.� – Lynn Vigliante

Goth means many different things to many different people but this is what it means to me: Goth is beauty. Those that are Goth are tender, sensitive, and courageous. Goth is empathy and Goths are the bearers of sorrow and sadness for a lost and dying world. Goth is an expressionist response to the pain and injustice that diminishes every human being. When one suffers, we all suffer. Goth is a gentle and elegantly masochistic answer to a cruel and sadistic society. Goth is choosing life when death is a seductively tempting option. Goth is art, a means of expressing the darkest and saddest of all human emotion. Goth is, always has been and always will be as long as people hurt.

- David Dellman

WHAT IS EMO?

Well, personally, I do not know and chose not to know. All I know is, EMO does not equal to GOTH. Plus as far as I know, Emos have to be at least a size 0. (Painfully thin for the less fashion forward) Goths come in all shapes and sizes.